We’ve all heard it before, the adage, that it takes twenty-one days to make or break a habit. Does that really mean it takes three weeks to change something? Is change only change when it’s a pattern consistently followed?
Any change that happens must be in line with someone’s values otherwise it will not be a change but a desire, wish or interlude; our values and our inherent beliefs. Beliefs are what we think about ourselves and our world to be true. If we believe that we are capable of change, then we can change. If we believe that we cannot change, then guess what, we won’t be able to.
I am in the business of change management. As a psychotherapist, Clinical Hypnotherapist and NLP Master Trainer, I use a variety of tools to aid my clients’ change. I teach them a variety of tools to use. What happens if a client comes to me begging for change? Do I immediately put into action the magic of my techniques or do I investigate further? Investigation is the key. Firstly, do they have the internal belief system that they are able to change? Secondly, is the change ecological, i.e. will the change work in their present situation to benefit the client? There’s no point in removing someone’s fear of water if they haven’t been warned about tides and currents; no point in creating confidence around snakes unless the person knows the difference between venomous or deadly and non aggressive or safe. Ecology in other words is context.
Once these two points have been ascertained, then, the next step is to establish whether they have the belief system that change can take effect. Whether they are turning away from pain or towards pleasure, the belief has to be that it is possible not just necessary. Needing to change and being able to change are two different positions.
So let’s imagine we have someone who believes that change is possible* and their ecology is sound. Change can happening a matter of minutes using Neuro Linguistic Programming and Clinical Hypnotherapy and change, it can stay.
*So what happens when a client does not have the belief system to support change? Values and belief systems have to be elicited and once identified, their code has to be put down. These are called sub-modalities in NLP. Now sub modalities of a more positive, change-oriented set of values.
The sub modalities are accurate and fine distinctions of the following modalities: Aural, Kinesthetic, Olfactory, Gustatory and Internal Dialogue that are part of each representation system that encode and give meaning to our experiences. In layman’s terms – the code of one is compared to the code of another and the codes of the person’s non-belief in change adjusted to the codes of belief in change. Then we can go through the steps.
Neuro Linguistic Programming promises fast, lasting change not just dependent on a desire but via a carefully considered trail of techniques. Clinical Hypnotherapy can take that positive belief in change and through suggestion, guide change. Whilst one is faster than the other, both effect long lasting change relatively quickly and less than the 21 days of repetition. Don’t mistake change for mastery. That, indeed, takes time but change itself, happens often in one session.
Got something that you’re stuck on? Find yourself a NLP Master Practitioner and quickly leave behind the non-resourceful states of your failures. It’s time to succeed and if necessary, change now.